you and i.

Saturday, June 30, 2007, 11:24 AM

1.Is there anyone you like at themoment?
- I like that handsome boy who alr has a gf.(:

2.Have you ever given or been givenroses?
given,throw away. im so sorry. well,dats the past.

3.What is your all-time favoriteromance movie?
spiderman still.(:

4.How many times have you honestlybeen in love?
honestly twice. others are just merely admiration.

5.Do you believe that everyone has asoul-mate?
soul mate,doesnt mean we have to love each other ryt?

6.Do you think that you should putyour friends first?
at times. sometimes friends put us behind,so we put them behind also lor.haha.

.7.Have you ever had your heartbroken?
many times .da lali dar.

8.What do you think aboutlong-distance relationships?
had one. for 4 yrs. and u think?haha. it practically sucks.

9.Your thoughts on onlinerelationships?
lets know each other better first den we'll take the next big step .

10.Would you rather date someone fiveyears older or five years younger?
i dont mind both. to me age is not the matter .

11.Have you ever seen a friend asmore than a friend?
i set a line . i try not to.

12.Do you believe thestatement, "Oncea cheater always a cheater"?
nop. i was once a cheater, but i changed. heh,see i told the truth.(:

13.How many kids do you want to have?
ONE.

14.Do you usually fall for the rightboy/girl?
sadly no. it always turned out the one i despised. But i look at him as an individual .

15.What is your favorite color(s)?
brown. black .green .

16.What are your views on gaymarriages?
i dont mind,its their sins not mine .

17.Imagine you're 79 & your spousejust died, would you re-marry?
nop . im too old alr sey .

18.At what age did you start noticingthe opposite sex?
11 .when i met my first loveee.hehe .

19.What song do you want to hear atyour wedding?
I'll stand by you by Carrie Underwoods. the sonf is so sweet and meaningful .

20.Do you think that someone likes u?
hes attached sey,sadly(:

Labels: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MASS, WE MEET TOMORROW

Tuesday, June 26, 2007, 4:07 AM

it sucks to see the exbf moved on after we parted two years ago.

one whom i have known since i was small,

have been with his gf for almost 1 yr i think.

after being with him and knowing him close for 4-5 yrs.

ive gota admit it hurts.

the other one,

was my last serious rship.

which was 2 yrs ago.

he has an ex after me, and currentl attached with a new one.

while im here,

still single as ever.

i admit,i date guys.

but i dont fall,or think otherwise.

caused i know its a date.

and to me,

a date doesnt involves feelings.

if like that,

ive been dating around 5 guys or so in the last two yrs,

and if that involves feeling,

i swear i must be pretty.

hahahahahaha.

but no,

a date to me is just like going out with any friend.

i still wonder how weird and funy this world can be.

how can one fall in love with another oposite sex,

and broke up and the other minute.

and have his/her replacement after parted.

wahlao.

seriously,

i dont understand.

and moving on doesnt mean you have to go find another one.

you can go on dates,but make it a ' no string attach.'

caused its funny how you can be attached to someone after breaking up with another.

ive been sigle for almost 2 yrs now.

where 21 july will be the exact figure.

and to that someone,

babe,

we're you're friend

and we only know that you're with that guy thorugh his pictures and his friendster profile.

how ridiculous can that sound?

because we dont feel that you still one of us.

but i dont care.

we are still your friend.

even if you have a new bunch.

we're a clique,rmb?

fine, some secrets are meant to be secrets.

but being with a new guy,

its a no secret for us laaa.

haha.

im not mad,

im just irritated by your attitude,since forever.

change babe.(:

Labels: cause i know its not personal(:, you can hold my hands if you want to

Monday, June 25, 2007, 12:03 PM

haikal told me he missed me minutes ago.

the first time i heard of him eversince a week ago.

i thought he was dead or smtng.

ok i shant be evil.

haikal,

you dont have to tell me that.

i dont need you anymore.

and trust me,

im not missing you anymore.

if you dont know,

ive deleted your msn and your numbers in my hp.

i am really keen to forget and erase you.

im sorry.

really i am.

i guess your kawan yang main baju lebih penting ape.

yes, he's in a gang.

and i dunt like this type of guys.

ergh,

see i spiled it out.

well.

its totally over between me and him

the only thing is that he doesnt know.

and one fine day im going to tell him off.

yes i will.

, 9:04 AM

i realised that it's really of no use to have a friendster with many people whom you dont know inside it.

heh.

but its up to individual.

i also used to have two accs but i end up having one.

and when it is full,

its verry iritating.

and now im bck to having a new acc.

where i only accept people whom i wished to.

so if you're on my friend's list.

pls do feel appreciated.

huhu.

anyways tmr sch.

the weekend is so fast.

i really need to buck up in sch.

ive been slacking,i admit.

ive been chtting up with one guy.

and i swear he's hot.

and he's all nice.

haha.

that's nice of him.

, 6:07 AM

it's weird how you can fall in love that fast with an online so called,

friend.

haha.

you just added her in friendster,

and now shes's your girlfriend?

hahahaha.

please ehy.

oh god.

some people!

, 4:49 AM

my love,

ive to admit you're the best i ever had.

the best i could asked for.

you made me smile by your corny jokes.

and you made me cried whenever you let go your hands that held my hands,and when ever you look away from me.

ive to admit im not a strong girl.

but i guess we have to let go.

let go of our times being together.

all the ups and downs we had together.

i got to listen to my brain,not my heart.

caused i believe the saying which says,

" Love is blind. And love is a mater of the hearts."

ive got to think about my future being with you,love.

this might be a cliche thing to say but,

loving someone doesnt mean that you have to spend the rest of my life with him.

therefore,

i still believe that whoever is going to be my life partner,

is may be someone whom i dont love.

but love,

i know its not going to be you.

caused i loved you.

and i know i wont be spending the rest of my planned life with you,

caused you're simply not in my league.

yes i have my own ego.

and you have your own,love.

that's why.

girls and boys were born not to understand each other.

but its funny how peole can fall in love with the opposite sex.

dont you think so,love?

we fought over minor things and we simply make up by the kisses and the way you held me around my waist.

its a funny thing.

how we can fight over and over again.

and I know exactly how you're going to make our relatonship better.

but i still try so hard to looked away from you.

but those eyes that stared at me,

and stating that you loved me,

made my heart melts.

honestly,

i dont know whether that is for real,

or you're just another STMF.

but love,

remember that one day i know we're going to be miles away.

and that one day,

i will still think of you.

caused i wont forget my past.

where the little steps made me where i am now.

that one day in the future,

i sit by the window and imagine who are you making out with at that moment,

while im all alone miles away,thinking of you.

and wonder if we ever bumped into each other sometime,

will you still remmeber how i looked like when i slept on your laps when we were blinded by our love.

and will you still remember my distorted face when i woke up in the morning in your arms.

i bet you wont,love.

but i will.

and i wonder why do we have to fall for each other from the beginning when i knew very well we were never going to last.

that, i still wonder.

-NuyulAishah,

Labels: my love.

Sunday, June 24, 2007, 11:50 AM

its saturday and im at home.

everyone asked me,

" Its Sat, not going wif your bf?"

i replied,

" find me a bf first"

lol.

ive been slacking at sch.

and it sucks.

my grades are dropping.

and my UT results are really a dissapointment.

i think that feeling is coming again.

that feeling inside me,

where i will feel the world and the people arnd me will turn their back to me.

oh god,

please dont make it this way.

and please make everything fall in the right place.

Labels: im not strong enuf to handle it all over again.

Saturday, June 23, 2007, 11:54 AM

I had fun spending my nights with the girls.

there were total five of us.

but things didnt go the way we wanted.

but i did have fun with you girls.

im still giddy and having a real bad headache.

i cnt even concentrate at sch just now.

even aaron said i was quiet today.

heh.

i dont even wished to fight back what anyone said just now.

and i swear i wasnt myself just now.

heh.well,eversince sch has reopens my grades are damn down.

caused i am trying to change some things.

but i hope i get more As now.(:

Thursday, June 21, 2007, 11:54 AM

school has start.

and it sucks,really.

im not in the mood still!

first day was computing and mathematics module, i swear i hate that module.

its freaking iiritating.(:

everyone was quiet and non reponsive in class.

we cant be bothered to talk to each other even.

heh.

today was communication module.

i did felt different to face Ms Nora after not getting into SA,as she was the advisor.

and mylast UT result was a dissapointment.

i wiished i can just forget about it.

erggggh.

and i cant wait for tmr.

i dont know who's going.

but im sure Mai and waty is.

im really hoping our nyt tgther will turn out well.(:

haikal and me,totally over.

i decided not to wait and move on.

futhermore hes not my type, at all.

forget it.

two years and counting,still.(:

Sunday, June 17, 2007, 9:27 AM

my term break is going to an end soon.

ohh tidaakkkkk!

ok,i officially hate rp.

heh.

caused i have reasons to.

no, not caused of my classmates.

caused of some outside people.

im lazy to cause a truble cause i know officially i wil win.

and you will end up laying down on my feet and cry.

heh,im so evil.

so,enough talking about that.it makes my blood go up(:

i have a long list of my wishlist.

here are some of it.

1.get a cardigan

2.buy another see thru bag. why? cos to me its cool.haha.

3.i want someone nice to buy me a digicam.caused mine was spoilt by fardly.and not by me.so its not fair for me to buy a new one.(:

4.buy more CHEAP clothes JUST for my pathetic sch.

5. get more shorter skirts,not longer. cause i cant stand the hotness of long skirtshahaha.

6. get my laptop accessories,fasttttt.(:

7.anyone to buy for me a new hp.cause my current hp is damn lousy.

8.stop buying pink stuffs.hahahaha.really,ive been buying pink stuffs,and i didnt take notice of that when i bought it. stupid sia nurul.hahaha.

9.i really really really wished i can change to a new and BETTER school. wuhoooo.(:

10. get myself slim.hahahahhahahhahaha.okeh shut up ehy.

there you go my freaking dreamsss. lol

i watched APM last night.

and i scream a lot of times.

obviously at our local artistes lor.

imran,sleeq,taufik,hady,didi.

omg they are superrrr duperrr hot la sey last niight.

ok i shall shut up.

im bored actually,its raining,and im sleepy.

byeeee.

psst, i have a thing for guys who read books in public.

mcm educated dude gitu.

wuhooooo!(:

Labels: rp sucks. wuhoooooo(:

Thursday, June 14, 2007, 6:44 AM

mas did this cos as we all know she got ntg to do in class,well,she always find herself to do ntg.heh. and yea i really miss those times.(:

and see closely the ps.

b,i syg you tapi i horny.

hahahhahaha.

yela,we nonsense what last time

hari raya. haha. these are the 3 couples you know. and waty was with that guy in blue! hahahahahahaha.
ini cute.hahahaha.

and i miss collaging pics.

here are some old pics i collage.(:

for a friend of mine.
heh,i rmb that i wrote haireel's name many times. alaa,zaman kemarok dulu.hahaha.
i just collaged this one. nice kan!!! haha,and i put it up in our shared accoung in frenster.

see this ah ma. i swear i dont know where she gone to.(:

our bday celebration
ignore tis.hahahaha. no im soooo over him. he has another new gf! can you believe tht.hahahaha.ok shhh.

Labels: randomly

Wednesday, June 13, 2007, 1:40 PM

now i really cant be bothered with guys.

well,let them be.(:

to dearest,

i think let us end it here.

let us just pretend we have never know each other.

im tired of waiting for your calls,which has never been happening.

im trying to deny my heart.

saying that i dont like you.

but i cant,you see.

everytime my phone rings,and everytime someone goes online,

i was only hoping for you.

and noone else.

but miracles dont ever happen to me.

i dont blame it on God.

never.

i just thought that this is part of pracel of growing up.

maybe its not even love that im feeling.

maybe its just mere infatuation or admiration.

but you have nothing to be admired about.

i dont blame you for everything.

i just think its unfair for me to still hang on to you.

maybe you have good intention,

you dont want me to be hurt by your outside friends,

thats why you may be trying to keep a distance from me.

but God knows.

i only wanted you to change.

dearest,

promise me you wont get into any fights anymore when im not by your side.

i dont want to hear from people,

you get yourself in trouble.

i want you to get rid of your company of friends.

i dont want to see you only change when 10 years has passed,the one you told me about.

i want you to change now.

i dont want you to regret all those stupid and nonsensical stuffs you're doing now.

dearest,your parents love you.

and i thank God they saved you before anything happened to you in the past.

dearest if only you know how miserable and hurt was i the way you're treating me.

the way you're acting when we're tgther.

but i dont want to keep thinking about it.

maybe that is just you.

you,

the kind i always hated to be with.

now,im trying to forget everything i know about you.

thanks for everything.

maybe we were never meant to be.

cos im better off with someone else that is much more better than you.

one who can be there whenever i need them.

unlike you,

only there when you want to.

Labels: let us come back to square one.

Sunday, June 10, 2007, 3:05 PM

im going with you girls on the 21st.

yahoooo.

prolly i wont be gng to sch again on that friday.

or go sch haywire.

hahaha.

i cant wait to spend time with you girls.

make it a crazy nyt.

and hope everything goes well,okay?

lets see if i fall asleep in there.huahuahua

okay la,inside joke.

hahaha.

Anyways,

went to meet waty to ACTUALLY find a cardigan.

but all small size.

we walked around town,

and i swear i was hyper and talked nonsense.

and to dearest waty,

sorry ehy to trouble you.

now YOU know how fickle minded and choosy i am.

but i appreciate it okeh.

da bagos tuh aku blanjer.hahaha

anyways,after that met Mai outside far east.

we went to bowl at Marina,my treat babeyh.

we played two game.

i lost. and sadly to say Mai was the terror one.

haha.

i had so much fun and laughter.

NOTHING is better than meeting up with the old girls.

i dont want sch to start sey.

i hate schooollll!

hahahaha.

but i will study hard,dont worry.(:

the night before,i had a fun time talking to you girls.

thaks for making me laughed like a mad girl like i used to during secondary school days.

you girls are the greatest gift from God.

and Mai,thanks for making me missing Khairul for that night.

and laughed like noone's business.

Im gng Batam tmr.

and i cant meet Haikal.

im sad,you know.

i missed him.

hahahaha,okay la.

wel,im gng to shop like hell okay.(:

I read SARA'S blog,

OI ader org nak kao jadi model ehy?

ALHAMDULLILAH!

hahahahhahahahahahahahahahaha

babes,i cant wait for 21st!!!!!!!!

i'll post the pics tmr alryts.(:

Labels: MAKE 21ST COME FASSSSTTTTTT(:

Friday, June 08, 2007, 4:44 PM

well, dearest haikal just called.

i almost threw my hp.

but when i heard your voice,

i pitied you.

i know you just went back from work.

and you're tired.

but honestly i dont feel the excitement there anymore.

is it because i know about who you really are now?

dearest,

i dont think i can hold on to this anymore.

i dont know the real you,just yet.

your outside world,what isit like?

well,

guys like you always have tons of girls around.

maybe we should just forget about going into the next big step.

maybe we shd just stop it here.

you doesnt seem wanting to change yourself to the better,even.

i dont want myself to get into trouble just bcause of you.

Oh God,

show me the right path.

i dont want to be selfish,

but will you be there for me when you are still with your group of friends that i totally despised.

uggh!

maybe not.

member lagik penting perrrrr.

im sad.

Labels: how about we end it here?

, 12:30 PM

i swear i was bored.

here are my "masterpieces"

i was bored hokays.

and i swear i laughed out soooo loud.

just look at it.

heh,i did that with paint.

many people say about me taking pics showing off my cleavage.

well,i took pic but with no intention to show my cleavage.

so here what i did.

and i did wear smtng on.except that it's super low cut.hahahahaha.

this pictures are disqustingly funnay.

HUAHUAHUAHUAHUA.STOP IT SIA NUYUL.
YES I DOOOOO.(:
HAHAHAHA. SOME KISSES FOR YOU BABES.

HOHOHOHOHOHO.

I SWEAR IM CRAZY RIGHT NOW.(:

Labels: wuhoooooooo (=

, 4:10 AM

the ones that my my day in class worthwhile.
same goes for SAM .(:
someone said i have a heart shaped face.ermm ooookayyy!(:
pearline. i love disturbing her.(:
johnny knoxville is hottt!
same goes for him!(:
yani.nuyul.ilii.(:
and again(:

, 3:59 AM

im going to shop with mum this sunday.

i swear i missed shopping.

i want to buy more tops.

its irritating to be in poly,

cause you cant prolly wear the same clothes the whole week.

yea im lazy la to actually change clothes every day.

and rp is really torturing.

i have to carry my lappy everywhr i go,

from tamp to wdlands.

i swear im not proud of my sch.

hoho.

but hell,if im going to stay there for the next 2 miserable yrs,

i will have no choice but to endure with it.

well at least got a diploma.

hoho.

the only thing that make my day in rp is basically my wonderful classmates.

nothing more than that.(:

im missing my girls.

ehy,i want to fly to the moon.(:

and i think i cant make it on the 21st la babes,

i got sch u know.

and i really wanna go.

make it on a friday lar babe.

if not i guess you girls go ahead without me again.(:

well,maybe God doesnt want me to make sins.

huahuahua.

im gng to regional lib to accomapny my dearest little bro.

and i swear im bored only staying at home.

girls are schooling,

dearest haikal is working.

awww.

am i miserable or what.

hahahaha.

Thursday, June 07, 2007, 9:44 AM

i realised its been a while since i last posted pictures.

so yea,i'l try to post pics whenever possible.

and term break is goddamn boring you know.

all my irls are schlng.

and when i start sch they all holies.

not fair.i really want to spend that night with you girls.

make it on a weekend please.(:

Monday, June 04, 2007, 3:40 PM

now that i know about your past,

i think twice about going out with you.

i have always trying to avoid your type.

and never did i expect you told me the truth just now when you called.

really,never.

but i want to be the one who change you to be a better person.

and i hope you will change.

i dont care if you want to hurt me,

i want you to change.(:

anyways,

haikal dearest called.

i swear i screamed out loud.

the longest convo we ever had on the phone.

thats why i knew more about him.

i swear i wanted to put down the phone and wished i hadnt knew him.

but well,

i try not to be selfish.

he wanted me to come over to his hse,

cos he missed me and he was bored.

but i didnt want to as i was lazy to get ready eventho our hse is not so far.

he wanted to come over to my hse then,

but i told him he better not.

as he was tired and sleepy.

and maybe next week meeting him.

and im unsure abt my feelings for him now.

must i get excited or shd i avoid him?

noooo.i wont la dearest.(:

so we taled crap.
and it wa totally crap.

out of a sudden he said,

"You,sing for me a Nelly Furtado song?haha."

i said to him,

"haikal,you ok or not?"

and he laughed non stop.

next was he asked me this,

"you,kenape kalau anak babi jalan,dier tunduk?"

i swear i laughed so hard caused he asked me out of the sudden.

he gave me this answer,

" give up kan. pasal dier malu mak bapak dier babi."

haha,i laughed so hard.

it was fun talking to him.

until he told me the truth about him.

but i have assure him with this,

" You, one who is a gd person cn become bad. And what more you. You jahat pon, bole ejadi baik pon kan. And i tak kan tinggalkan you. And i understood your situation if you cnt be in a rship."

i swear i wanted to cry when he said that he cared for me thats why he cant meet me that often.

god, i ame to realise this.

love can definitly be blind.

i have always dislike your kind.

and now i think im falling for you.

i guess i have to be strong to face all this.

and i know you be htere right by my side.

Labels: dearest, i swear im going to be by your side. even if we cant be together. (:

, 12:17 PM

ytd i had fun shopping with my uant and cousins.

but sadly i couldnt get to meet with darling Quorfaine,

as i dont habe the time ytd.

my deeply apologies.(:

anyways,my sunday today is damn boring.

my cousins are at home.

and i swear i laughed a lot.

but i get bored as i couldnt go out.

i want go buy things for my lappy.

and buy contact lense.

im gng to ask dad for money again after he gave me a huge amnt of money ytd.

heh,sorry my human atm.(:

holidays are simply boring.

my darlings is still having sch.

and rp early early da holies.

boring tau!

haikal called me at 4.30 am just now.

but i didnt ans.

i was dead tired and asleep.

im sorry dearest.

i guess he slept ytd night,as he may have his night shift ytd.

im trying my best not to fall for you,just yet.

im sorry if my actions may hurt you.

or the other way round.

anyways to dearest sara,

i may not know whats happening in your life.

call myself a friend.

but whatever it is girl,

be strong.

i love you.

and i can be your listening ear.

just be strong and study well alryts!(:

even if i have haikal,

you're the one who brightens up my day with your silly jokes.

and i miss you gemok!