i swear i cant stop crying eversonce 10pm.
First was about SA.
i didnt want to cry,but if people who know me close enuf will know how sensitive i can be at very little teeny weeny things.
i still think its unfair that i cant be in it.
but,well,
what to do,it just aint my luck.
i decided to slp early.
but when haikal called,
i cant help but cried harder.
he asked whether im ok,
but i cant help,but i have to putt down my phone.
im upset about not getting into SA, and caused i failed my UT terribly.
how worst can i be?
how terrible can i be?
i did all these bcos of my parents.
i want them to be proud of me,
but i guess i failed.
i told haikal i just feel like quiting sch,
and he was mad.
i swear i couldnt care less.
im not gng to sch tmr,
which is today.
i got no mood,
and my eyes are swollen like hell.
its been a while since i cried like noone's business.
the last one i did was bcos of one pathetic guy.
but no,
i did this cause of my parents.
i think i made the wrong desicion.
i shdnt go iinto rp at the first place.
shdnt be in thatclass.
shdnt have know people i have know in rp.
and shdnt have choosed SA at the first place which i tot can make my life in RP much more interesting.
well,i was wrong.
i couldnt quit sch just yet.
my mom paid $7700 for 1 pathetic year sch fees.
is rp for real?
maybe i just study like noone else care.
and be an antisocial and a quiet girl like i used to.
no,im not crying bcos of SA,
its just that i think i made a mistake in my life.
i terrible mistakeeee.
mom,dad,
im sorry i have to dissapoint you.
and i have yet to tell you both the bad news.
im sorry for i cant be a good and a daughter that can make you both proud.
cause some people just cant see wh i trully am.
and theres only 2 person who can.
you both and my quorfaine girls.
and i really in need of love.
girls,lets meet up soon.
i miss you girls.
and i swear i wont be missing school.
maybe im starting to hate it.
urgggggh!
