I have been terribly sick. The feeling of having sorethroat, and coughing blood is not fun at all. Now I have fear everytime I cough, cause the blood I saw yesterday morning freaks me out. Its scary, I thought I was going to die. It doesnt sound so scary, but if you saw that blood that lasted for 30 minutes, I thought everything ends there. I do have a confession to make, but I guess no, nobody should know about it, only that someone. My situation is much more worst than you can imagine. I suffered this way because of one thing, guys. No, not because of that bloody asshole Ikin, but guys in general. Last night was like the downfall of all of it. A secret I have told noone. But only to you, cause I was so stressed up yesterday. I cried till I fell asleep. I had swollen eyes in the morning. I gave school a miss. I took 4 pills to make myself go back to sleep and so that I wont bother thinking about what's on my mind. I may not be like what I sound when Im outside. Really, I can crack stupid jokes, laugh and saying Im all alright. but the fact is I am not.
Honestly, Im tired of crying, making myself suffer this way. But the thought of it, make me so mad, that my mind think indecisively.
Im very much hurting over here. Im sick, and all I think about is to get better. But I cant bring myself to. I kept blaming myself. Afterall, I brought all this upon myself, didnt I? I wonder why some people can be happy out there, while I cant. Why cant I have someone who care for me so much. Argh, seriously this is driving me crazy. Enough said, Im off to get more sleep, so I wont have to think about this.
I have been terribly sick. The feeling of having sorethroat, and coughing blood is not fun at all. Now I have fear everytime I cough, cause the blood I saw yesterday morning freaks me out. Its scary, I thought I was going to die. It doesnt sound so scary, but if you saw that blood that lasted for 30 minutes, I thought everything ends there. 